May 2017Life Love and Hiccups: May 2017
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Monday, 22 May 2017

FETCH Me The Remote

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Brought to you by Nuffnang & Fetch

Fetch me the remote people because I am officially the Queen Bee of the Box… at least I am in Chateau Le Hiccups!

OK so technically I am kind of a self declared Queen Bee… but excuse me, I truly believe that I have earned this position.

You see, for years I have clung by my shellac to the very bottom of the hierarchy that determined who gets to control the tv remote. Once upon a time, I was top dog and I was right there at the top of that hierarchy and I could flick to and fro and change stations whenever I felt like it.

I watched whatever sparked my interest, the hubby was happy for me to choose the Friday night movie (I was generally uncontested given he usually fell asleep before the first ad break), and if I wanted to watch Big Brother… well I darn well did and there were no questions asked.

And then we had kids.

For a while it appeared that I was maintaining my control of that remote. Thanks to a baby that slept like clockwork, I was totally up to date on who was doing who on the Bold and The Beautiful… but then slowly, that control began to waver and eventually… it just kind of slipped away.

Neighbours was replaced by Night Garden, The Bold and The Beautiful was replaced by Bear In The Big Blue House and the only TV I had time to watch was a snatch of the late night news as I sat in the dark feeding a baby.

For a looooong long time it seemed that I was destined to live a life of G rated viewing and the only reality TV that featured on my G rated diet was a show that involved celebrities being dunked in green slime.

The years passed and then one day a small glimmer of light shown through and it seemed that; perhaps, our children were losing interest in TV and bumped it in favour of homework and bedtimes. 

Bahaha, oh alright, that’s not exactly how it played out. I may have conveniently tweaked the homework and bedtime schedules to conflict very nicely with the Rose Ceremonies and other important episodes.

Hallelujah Marge, the rains came and once again I was reunited with my beloved remote control.

My children and hubby were fed an introductory diet of Masterchef and The X Factor and they even kind of enthusiastically (with some encouragement) learned to love a good rose ceremony or two…  but try as I did (and oh I did try) they just never understood my connection with The Kardashian Family.

As our own little family grew, I found myself out numbered by males in our house, four to one to be precise. It was inevitable that my reign over the remote would be challenged, and challenged it was. I fought hard… oh I fought very hard, but alas the footy and surfing and Bondi Rescue were the victors and me and my reality mates were the big old losers.

Now hold on… don’t go getting all sad on me, this is not a sad story. You didn’t really think I was just going to give up did you? 

If you think back to a couple of paragraphs ago, I started this post with the announcement that I am the Queen Bee of the remote right? There’s nothing sad about that. It fact it clearly indicates a happy ending so let’s get to the happy ever after part shall we?!

A happy ending it is indeed, because you see last week a little box arrived on our doorstep and was my husband’s or my children’s names on that box? 

Nooooo. it had MY NAME on it! 

I know, I know… you are dying to know what was Inside that box right? 

Well here’s the bit where you’ll probably need to hold me… 

Wait…nope, I’m good… for now.

You see - in that box was another very special box and a shiny new remote control also with MY name on it. 

Oh yeah, Christmas came early for mama you guys -  because I am an official #motherfetcher reviewer and one very proud owner of Fetch.

Yup, yup, yup… I am now the chuffed up owner of Fetch Mighty and it sits proudly on the Parker in our lounge room like it #motherfetching owns the place… which it kind of does because when we attached that mighty little box to the TV and internet… it does all kinds of awesome things and I am in charge.

They can watch Footy and surfing if they like… heck they can watch Disney, MTV, National Geographic and all the Nikelodeon slime fests and episodes Bondi Rescue that they can possibly stomach… but all at a time that suits everyone… me included.

Now I am only just scratching the surface here you guys, because it hasn’t been plugged in for long with us yet and I’ll share more as we discover more about this mighty little box, but so far we can tell you that Fetch is quite possibly one of the greatest inventions ever… at least in my humble opinion.

I mean, get this… it gives us access to over 6000 of the latest and greatest movies that we can rent or buy on demand. We watched Lion on our Friday Night Family movie night. LION people! The seats are still warm from the bums of people watching LION in cinemas and we could watch it from the comfort of our own couch.

That is quite possibly worthy enough on its own to swoop in and claim the title of ‘the best ever invention ever’.

We can watch all our regular free to air TV programs and rather than argue over who gets to watch what and when… we all get to watch because our mate Fletch the Fetch can record up to 6 shows at once whilst we are watching another.

We can purchase individual or entire seasons of all of those tv shows I’ve been wanting to watch but have yet to see - HELLO Game of Thrones - and we can even play catchup on our regular TV as we can access Catch up TV apps like Plus7, 9Now and Tenplay and more on our fancy new friend. 

Wanna know my favourite thing about Fetch?

My absolute knee slapping favourite thing is that you can watch Netflix and Stan via Fetch which means that the winter hibernation /series binge festival has officially begun.

OK, let’s get to the cost of all this awesomeness because I know that’s probably what is going through your head right now.,, right? 

So, you can buy Fetch Mighty outright for just $399 RRP and pay a $1.00 activation fee for the starter pack. The starter pack includes TV Recording, Catch up TV Apps, Netflix and Stan Apps (you just use your own subscription to watch these), Fetch Mobile, and access to the TV and Movie Store and it’s 6000 titles where you can rent or buy the movies as you like. 

You can subscribe to the TV packages that include E!, HGTV Home and Garden, Style and ESPN and they start from just $6.00 per month or $20 per month for the lot.

Alternatively, a number of providers offer Fetch bundles (including the Starter Pack) in their internet packages with prices from with plans from $10 - $15 depending on the provider. You can check out the who and hows of those providers and packages here.

There you have it - that is the official lowdown of how I managed to snatch back my title of Queen of The Box. I’m happy, the hubby is happy and the kids are happily earning points in my genius reward system - a marvellously devious set up of mine where they can earn points for good behaviour and then buy ‘Fetch Time’ with their points. 

You guys so need some Fetch in your life, you truly do.

Now if you will excuse me, I have Season 2 of Orange is The New Black to devour.

Do you need a little Fetch in your life?
What is your absolute must not miss tv show at the moment?

Thursday, 18 May 2017

Four Years After A Little Insane Courage

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A memory popped up in my Facebook feed yesterday from 4 years ago...

It was a reminder that it is 4 years since my fabulous midlife meltdown that resulted in me doing the craziest thing I have ever done - quit my job, bringing to an end my 20 year career in order to make those dreams of mine I had... a reality.

FOUR YEARS you guys!!!

Sweet Baby Cheeses, I can remember it as clearly as if it were only last month...  maybe because it was single handedly one of the most scary and yet at the same time, most exhilarating things I have ever done in my entire life to date.

That phone call I made to my boss that day literally slammed the brakes on my life and brought everything to a stand still.

I had no idea what I was going to do with myself.

I had no idea how I was going to be able to afford such a frivolous act of spontaneity.

I had no idea where I would even begin to start with those dreams I had, let alone where I would be with them four years on.

I had no idea who this crazy person was that I had become and what possessed me to do such a thing.

What I did know was that when I arrived back from Bali only the day before, I was desperately miserable. Miserable enough that I was willing to walk away from the past twenty years of my working life, away from the security and the stability of the company I worked for and away from my career and possibly the best income I could ever hope to earn again.

I knew I didn't want a job that required travel and for me to be away from my husband and my kids so much.

I knew that I wanted to be the one to drive my kids to school and be there when they came home.

I knew in my heart that what I was doing each day.... wasn't what I was born to do.

And so I quit and vowed to at the very least pretend to be brave and chase those dreams from that moment on.

Do I regret it?

That is one of the most frequent questions I have been asked since then and that's an easy one for me to answer...


NO, not for one freaking moment do I regret it!

Look, I am not going to lie to you. There have been panic inducing times in the past four years when money has been so tight that I wondered how we were going to pay the school fees or the car rego and I have no doubt there will probably be more times like that.

We have had to make some mighty big changes in our family life to afford me to not have to go back to the corporate world.

We haven't been on holidays since I quit my job, we can't afford to buy all the latest and greatest technology or toys. Rarely do we go out to fancy places for dinner or splash money around on expensive gifts or days out.

But we are happy.

Like really happy.

Like living my dream kind of happy.

Four years ago, I thought money equalled happiness. Ha... how wrong I was.

Don't get me wrong... we all know that money can buy you things or allow you to do things that can make you feel happy, but that kind of happiness doesn't generally last all that long, nor does it dull that miserable feeling in the pit of your stomach when you open your eyes in the morning to face another day of doing something that doesn't make you happy.

Do you know that feeling?

I hope you don't, but if you do then I have this to say to you...

Had I not had that one moment of insane courage that allowed me to leap without overthinking it all.... well then my dream would be nothing more than that today - still just a dream.

Apart from marrying my hubby and having our children... that one moment of insane courage was the best darn thing that has happened to me.

I'm not saying that taking a blind leap of faith is the right thing for everyone to do, but I will say this; there is always going to be a reason why it's not the 'right time' to do something big and brave and scary... our fear alone will somehow manage to FIND us a reason.

But maybe whilst we are waiting for the 'perfect time'... the 'perfect opportunity' might just sail right on past us, and what an awful shame that would be.

Don't ever discredit what a big impact just a little bit of courage can have on your life.

If you ever find yourself standing on the edge of something so scary but potentially so great but you are too afraid to move forward... my advice to you would be this; close your eyes, take a big breath and just leap because it might just take only one brief moment of insane courage to bring those dreams of yours to life too.

Thursday, 11 May 2017

What's Been Going Down In Da Hood

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My Dream Ride - From The Happy Bloom

Damn I've been feeling so gansta this week.

It's like I fell asleep on the weekend and woke up all renewed and ready to roll again.

That being said, I should probably make a little more of an effort to dress the part and wear something more fitting to my fresh 'gansta' mood than the 3 year old cardie and Uggs I've currently got on as I lie here on the couch with my poodle on my feet and my tea and chunk of home brand chocolate coated honeycomb.

I feel like I maybe I should be dressed like some bike riding leather clad badass or something... although I am under no illusions that I would be able to squeeze my current excuse of an ass into any kind of leather and I'm pretty sure the pastel coloured ride that I dream of does not exactly qualify as Badass or Gansta.

I do know this - there would be some atomic eye rolling going on if my kids read this as they would be mortified at the idea of me - a forty something year old mum - using the word Gansta.

Whatever MOFOS.

Yep kids, I just called you MOFOS.

Your mama is SO down with the lingo.

So it's no secret that I've not exactly been feeling myself lately... well not for the past 7 months or so for whatever and no particular reason, but then this week, it's like the fog lifted and the spring has returned to my limp.

I think I might have been held captive by that renegade Mercury in Uranus or whatever it's called.

That renegade retrograde or whatever planet has been supposedly causing some chaos on us humans for quite some time now, but the good news is it is cutting us loose and we are free to be like our old selves again.

Don't quote me on that - after all I did read all that at midnight on Sunday night after binging the entire series of Girl Boss on Netflix and the website I happened to read it on had loads of pictures of aliens and weird looking mummified things... so I am not exactly sure how legit it was.

But I do like the idea of being free of the Debbie downer mood I've been wearing for the past few months.

I certainly had more of a swing in my hips when I arrived at my local cafe for my coffee after the school run this morning and I wasn't afraid to flex some of my fresh new mood with the young guy at the coffee counter either.

He dropped one of my $2 coins down the side of the coffee machine when I handed him my money for my coffee. He didn't even try to stick a skinny arm or a broom down there and get it out or anything... he just stood there and looked at me as if I was going to hand him another coin from my wallet.

I of course laughed as I shoved my wallet in my bag and then as karma would have it (probably for me laughing at a minor), I gagged on the free sample of the fancy gluten free, dairy free bland as a mouthful of bleached toilet paper Paleo granola bar that I helped myself to out of spite.

I don't even like granola bars... and it made me gag.

Like proper gag.

And because I didn't yet have any COFFEE to wash it down with, I could have like properly died or something right there in the coffee shop in my 3 year old cardie and uggs, surrounded by yummy mummys in their active wear and parked bugaboos.

All the while that dude was still standing there waiting with his 'whatever weird lady' stare on, expecting me to cough up another $2 bucks.

So I did... I gave him a $2 coin from the tip jar and said "It's OK... Your day will get better because Mercury is coming out of Your Anus".

Yep... I'm SOOOOO gangsta.

Out of interest... would you have handed over another $2 bucks?
Also, has Mercury been messing with you lately?

Wednesday, 3 May 2017

13 Reasons is Way MORE Than Enough

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I finished watching that Netflix series 13 Reasons Why last night.

YES I know, I know, I'm probably a bit of an idiot for even admitting that because no show has caused a greater divide among us people since that Moses dude did that thing with the red sea... not that that was a tv show or anything... um yeah moot point.

But I get the divide, I see the merit in the arguments both the experts and the spectators have put forth from either side of the fence and rest assured I'm not here to poke at anyone who sits on either side or pass judgement on their decision.

Oh hell no, because you see; it's an insanely personal decision whether you choose to watch it or not, and it also happens to be a subject that has ignited many flaming exchanges both online and off.

Heck, even my hubby and I were on complete opposite sides of the table when I first told him that I was going to watch it. He felt very strongly against it, but he respected my reasons why I was choosing to and that's the way it should be...  we each respect each other's choices and that's why I sure as hell won't be judging your reasons to watch it or not.

None of us should.

Initially, I wasn't going to, watch it that is... given it the storyline is around suicide - a subject that I have spoken of before here and here... a subject that evokes all kinds of distressing emotions within me.

But a couple of weekends back, I picked my son and two of his friends up from a gathering with their high school friends and they were discussing 'the show' in the car on the way home.

Admittedly, I completely freaked out when they told me they had been watching it and that most of their friends had too, suicide contagion is something that absolutely terrifies me... but, I made the personal choice right there and then that I needed to watch it myself so that I was in a position to talk it through with my teenage son when inevitably the questions would come.

I watched all 13 episodes in two days and whilst I have to admit I was plagued with nightmares last night and have found myself haunted by scenes from the show all day, I don't regret my decision.

In fact, I am glad I have watched it as it flicked the switch on a lightbulb moment for me.

You see, whilst the show centres around so many different topics - all unquestionably awful and terrifying topics - it was the constant theme of them all that bothered me the most - the constant head turning.

You know what I am talking about right?

The putting on of blinkers and turning away when one sees someone else being bullied, victimised or treated badly.

I hate to think of how many times I have turned away in my lifetime, intentionally or not, and I also know myself how completely gutted I have felt when I have been the subject under attack and no one spoke up in my defence.

I cannot bear to think of that happening to anyone I care - my husband, my family, my friends or God forbid my children.

I cannot bear to think of it happening to anyone.

But it does, and it happens EVERY SINGLE DAY.

I see it on FB and instagram and in various closed online groups and communities I belong to ALL THE TIME, groups and communities that are supposed to be nurturing and supportive and yet right there within that 'safe environment' there is always someone that takes it upon themselves to throw some nasty at someone else. And whilst we all may see it happen, most of us will simply click away (the keyboard equivalent of turning our heads) and very few will be brave enough to speak up and call out the bad behaviour in fear of provoking an attack on themselves.

I understand why.

I mean it's not like we actually want to go looking for trouble right? Hell, most of us do everything we can to avoid it at all costs.

But what is that cost?

It's the same in the offline world.

We hear someone say something mean, sarcastic, maybe even quite vicious to (or about) someone else, and suddenly a cat swoops in and swipes our tongue. Yet again we think we are avoiding conflict or even doing the right thing by not getting involved.

But right there in that moment, we have a choice.

We can engage in it, ignore it or we can call it out and put a stop to it.

I like to think I have been pretty good at calling it out... but I also know that there are so many times I haven't, and that realisation was the lightbulb moment I had after watching the series and I am now more than ever resolved to pulling up my big girl panties and calling that behaviour out - whether it is against me or someone else.

None of us really need or want any additional drama in our lives... but what about the person who is standing there in front of us either in person or as a profile avatar online? They are exposed and vulnerable, shocked and hurting, and what is that doing to them?

It does all kinds of unimaginable damage.

That's what it does.

So I urge everyone, PLEASE, let's be brave enough to speak up and speak out when we see it happening. Let's speak up for ourselves when someone is doing wrong by us. Let's speak up for our friends and for strangers who need us, the fellow mum or woman in a FB group, the instagrammer we follow, the person someone is speaking so badly about behind their back.

Speak up for anyone who needs SOMEONE to stand next to them, even if it only provides comfort and support for a mere moment. It all counts in the bigger picture and hopefully our bravado will inspire someone else to be brave etc etc, maybe even our own kids...

13 Reasons Why is a sickening number of reasons anyone would feel the need to end it. Please for the love of God let's try and prevent wherever possible anyone having even one reason to begin with, because just one reason alone is one too many.

How brave are you when it comes to speaking up?
Have you watched 'that series'?