My youngest son is getting ready to do his Confirmation at school and part of the tradition is for him to choose a Saint that he identifies with and take that Saint's name as his confirmation name.
I am so not exaggerating when I tell you that this exercise has led to a whole new patch of grey hair sprouting from my head.
Little grey hairs that pop out of my head next to my ears like crusty the clown.
Trying to explain to a pig headed eight year old that I have searched long and hard and I am fairly confident that there is NO Saint of Skateboarding, is like trying to convince a kid that eating Brussel sprouts won't kill them... he just isn't buying it.
"Look again Mum, there will be one somewhere on Google" he said as he shook his head at me in complete denial.
"Dude, I have looked, and there is NO Saint of Skateboarding"
"OK then what about a Saint of... ummm... I know... motorbikes and stuff" he countered.
"I think you are missing the point mate" I reasoned. "You have to choose a Saint that represents a cause or a belief that you care about and relate to".
"I care about motorbikes" he demanded. "I LIKE motorbikes!"
"You do not!" I retorted trying to stay as calm as possible without completely losing my shit. "You've never mentioned motorbikes before and you have never even ridden a motor bike and beside - over my dead body will you EVER ride one if I have anything to do with it"
I could see the clogs turning and he looked at me with a sly smile.
"Wellllll then derrr... if I rode a motorbike and you were dead then YOU could be the Saint and I could have YOUR name" and with that he flicked a booger at the dog and left me alone with my laptop and Google and a very creepy feeling that motorbikes has just joined tinsel and clowns on my nightmare list.
I am pleased to say that we have since found a saint that he identifies with.
Saint Leo the Great was pope during fearsome times. He led the Church wisely and courageously, refusing to fear any threat, any difficulty, or any army.
That sounds about right.
Fearless of any threat... especially any threat that I could ever make.
Yep Saint Leo is a pretty good choice in my opinion.
Have your kids ever left you feeling particularly creeped out?
Is there anything more disgusting than booger flicking?