So I have This Friend of a Friend ........ | Life Love and Hiccups: So I have This Friend of a Friend ........
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Tuesday, 14 August 2012

So I have This Friend of a Friend ........

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So I have this friend of a friend right and she has a wonderful husband who she loves with all her heart and soul and everything could almost be as perfect as she could ever hope for .... except for the nasal symphony that comes from his nose every night.

She has tried everything she can imagine. Gently plucking the hairs from his head, calmly shoving him in the middle of his back until he rolls on his side, running her finger nails over his lips until the itching becomes so unbearable he wakes and goes looking for the bug spray thus giving her a 5 minute window of opportunity to get to sleep. But alas, nothing works.

I am at my wits end. The poor woman is getting slightly frustrated *choke splutter gag* to say the least. She tried wearing ear plugs, but shoved them in her ears so deep she ended up with a middle ear infection. She tried buying him nose sprays and plastic nasal strips designed to keep his airways open, but the force of the gusts coming from his nose left them flapping in the wind and doing jack squat as far as silencing the racket.

There is a solution - apart from separate bedrooms which she really doesn't want (who else would she put her cold feet on to warm up on those cold winter nights?). Yup folks, her husband needs a nose job!

Now come on - it's not as sever as it sounds. Heck if Alexis can suffer through it on The Real Housewives of OC so can my hubby her better half.

Lets put things in perspective here - if woman can push a marginally smaller than a baby elephant human being from their vaginas, surely you can allow a Doctor to break your nose and reset it so it doesn't protest so loudly in the wee hours of the night. I know its probably gonna be a little uncomfortable.. trust me I hear ya .... but so are the invisible knives that repeatedly stab our uteruses every month and do your hear them at 1am? I rest my case your honour.

Anyone know an ENT specialist that will give a family discount for a noisy husband, three little boys and a hairy dog? Or perhaps a Plastic Surgeon who would like to sponsor this blog in return for a little surgery on the side - you know contra deals are the way to go.

Come on.... I know a tired cranky woman who will be eternally grateful.

Do you live with a snorer? 
What tricks do you use to silence the rhapsody?

If my hubby is reading this, I know it may seem like I am referring to you, 
but clearly I am talking about a friend. Love you huni!

Today I am linking up with
The Fabulous Jess from Diary of a SAHM