We were supposed to be looking for props for his Book Week Costume and we had gone backwards and forwards between Vampires, Harry Potter, Where's Wally and back to Vampires. He couldn't make his mind up and I was quickly losing mine.
After much arguing we finally settled on Where's Wally and muttering under my breath I headed to the counter to pay for a stripy Hot water bottle I intended to turn into a hat. All that time spent and all I had was a lousy bloody hot water bottle cover to show for my efforts.
To say I was seriously pissed off would be a slight understatement so when he disappeared as we were about to leave, I finally blew a gasket.
"SAMMMMMMMMM" I screamed across the crowded shop, ignoring the glare of bewildered shoppers. "GET HERE NOW!"
He eventually appeared holding this hideous green ball and so began the stand off of the year. Me versus him and the bloody green rubber bouncy frigging ball and face to face despite a shop full of spectators we went to war.
"But I really want it Mum" he whined.
"Put it back now" I quietly seethed.
"Noooooo I really really want it" he begged.
"PUT . IT . BACK . NOW" was my less than patient reply.
He shook his head and defiantly crossed his arms and planted his feet.
The teenage girl behind the counter tapped her foot and asked if we were buying the ball or not?
And so I lost it.
"NO WE ARE NOT BUYING THE BLOODY BALL!" I spewed out at the shop asistant complete with frothing of the mouth (note to teenage shop assistants - please don't provoke raging mamas!)
"SAM YOU HAVE NOT PICKED UP A SINGLE PIECE OF DOG POO THIS WEEK, PUT THAT DAMN BALL BACK NOW OR I .... OR I ..... OR I AM GOING TO DO SOMETHING YOU AND I ARE BOTH GOING TO BE SO SORRY FOR!" I roared with blood pumping, face burning and veins popping.
The ringing in my ears was louder than ever courtesy of the complete stunned silence that fell upon the shop.
With tears in my eyes I grabbed that ball out of his hands and I pegged it. I have no idea where, I just pegged it across the shop, turned around and stormed out to my hubby.
And so I went home and made myself a hand bag, and drank vodka. Cause clearly that was going to make everything better. And surprisingly it did, though I am not sure if it was the high I was on from locking myself away from my children in my lady cave and doing my little sewing project or the vodka working it's medicinal magic.
Either way, I felt better and I could almost put one of the darker parenting days behind me.
I found a tutorial for this bag from this fab blog here. I have no idea how I came across this site, googling "An easy bag tutorial for someone who is a total sewing amateur" may or may not have led me there. Who knows, but if you want to make this fabulous reversible bag for yourself, here's the link.
Have you totally lost your shit in a public before?
How do you recover from the Shopping trip from hell?
What's your kid going to Book Week as?