So I have this friend right and she was driving her son to his Knitting lessons (umm yeah the activity may have been changed to protect the innocent). Her son's friend was also in the car and coming along to watch him umm knit and they were all happy having a bit of a banter and a laugh on the drive.
Oh crap this is all too hard and since I have already destroyed any hopes of being the perfect mum with my previous parenting catastrophes, I may as well go the full hog and tell it how it is right?
As I eluded to we were driving to Saturday morning sport and my son and his friend and I were having a bit of a chat about the girls at their school. I was putting in my orders for who I felt would be great Daughter in Law material, you know for future reference, when I noted a reaction from my son at the mention of one particular girls name.
Of course that was as good as waving a red flag thingy to a bull cause I just totally grabbed that hint of a reaction and started bolting with it.
"Ohhh have I struck a nerve with that name?" I teased my son. The giggle from the back seat suggested that I was in fact on the right track.
"Stop it Mum" my son muttered as he looked out the window.
"Oh what's wrong honey? It's okay if you like her, I totally approve".
Why do I not have an off switch? I really have no filter do I?
"Seriously Mum - Just STOP" was his reply. Cue more giggles from the back which I stupidly didn't take as a signal to back off.
I continued to blabber on "Hey look I can totally understand if you do have a crush on her, she's sweet and smart, and polite and oh she's really pretty isn't she?"
"Honey"? I prodded
He turned to me with tears in his eyes and mouthed the words "STOP"
Oh kill me now! Have I no shame? All I could think to myself was oh you awful excuse for a mum!
We pulled up at out destination and I raced around to his side of the car and pulled him out and straight into my arms. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" I pleaded, "Please don't be mad at me, normally you think it is fun this joking teasing thing that us mums do"!
I turned to his friend and asked "Does your Mum do this too, you know, tease you about girls and stuff"?
He nodded and rolled his eyes and said "Yep and I hate it".
Oh Crap, Crap and double fudgey Crap. I am the most awful Mum ever!
They walked off ahead of me and I was left to hang my head and drag my tail in shame behind them.
I felt truly awful, one of my lowest parenting moments yet and I was well and truly suitably chastised. But in my defense, you watch all those American Teen shows and they are all giggling and joking with their parents about crushes etc and pretty much up until now, it has been the same in our house too.
I thought I had at least until he went to high school to have some fun with this kind of stuff. I knew once they reached high school the embarrassing mum gig has to be toned down, but already? Sheesh - where's the fun in that?
He forgave me later that day, after I had received the suitable amount of silent treatment that was in proportion to my crimes. He said he forgives me but he was very disappointed in me and I should have known better. Oh man *sinking even lower into the ground*. Want to know how to really punish your parents kids? - Use their own words against them!
I think I need to cut back on watching American movies and the Disney Teen channel. Perhaps the use of Apple Pies in those movies and the things that happened this one time at band camp were some kind of warning signals that just happened to shoot straight over my head.
I'm heading into uncharted territory here. God Help Me!
Have you stuffed it up as bad as me?
Any other subjects I should avoid in future?
Do you like to look at the crop and see if you can pick potential in laws?