Ok so the title is a little misleading, as my kids didn't actually brag about the size of their ahem..bits. Give them a few more years and I have no doubt the discussion will occur.
For now, their bragging is limited to more G rated things. But let me tell you - they certainly pumped themselves full of hot air yesterday.
Mr 6: You are the war game expert cause you know EVERYTHING about war and stuff.
Mr 10: Yeah I do know a lot don't I. I am like the best at PlayStation and skateboarding too. Do you wish you could ride a Ripstick like me?
Mr 6: Kind of but I am heaps betterer at soccer than you. Actually I think I am one of the best soccer players ever.
Mr 10: I think we are both the best cause I am really good at soccer too. Also I am soooooo good at cooking and I am really really funny.
Mr 6: I am going to be really funny when I am bigger. I am pretty funny now and I am good at Karate. Now that I think of it we are pretty good at everything arent we?
Mutual Nodding and agreement
Mr 6: Mum you and Dad should feel really lucky you got us as kids.
This was seriously the conversation between 2 of my boys in the car on the way home from shopping yesterday.
Now I am all for building confidence and having kids believe in themselves, and I cannot tell you how happy I am to hear my boys talk about themselves in such a positive way rather than put themselves down.
There have been times where my boys have seriously lacked confidence for different reasons and we collectively as a family have worked really hard together to change the way they view themselves. There is nothing more heartbreaking than seeing a child shy away because he or she lacks in confidence or does not feel they are good enough at something.
My boys are wonderfully empathetic and very proactive when it comes to building self esteem in their friends, however I think perhaps I need to focus a little on the Modesty aspect with my children when it comes to their own egos.
It was kind of funny listening to them prattle on and on in the car ride, but I really do not want my kids to become egotistical.
I do tell them frequently how wonderful and clever they are and now I find myself questioning:
Do I tell them too often?
Is there such a thing as too often when it comes to a child's confidence?
Have I completely and utterly screwed this up in some way?
Was yesterday a warning sign that I have OVERinflated their egos in my attempts to nurture and develop their self esteem or was it just healthy behaviour for this age group? It is a really fine line I am treading here and tonight it is something I find myself pondering.
I frequently say to my boys - Be confident! Even if you are not, pretend to be, because no one can tell the difference. Have they taken this too far? I am thinking I had better refer to my parenting books for some answers to this one. If you have any gems please feel free to share them with me.
All that said, I can't help but be a little envious of their ability to express their confidence so unselfconsciously and say what comes to mind. Kids have a way of saying things so bluntly but in such an innocent way that sometimes try as you might, you just cannot get mad at them.
Wouldn't you love to be able to get away with saying the things that kids do - just for one day?
What would you say and to whom if there was no judgement or consequences for your words?